The Battles Women Face
Whatever Your Situation, Do Not Allow the Voice of The Enemy to Penetrate into Your Spirit and Tear You Down.
The Battles Women Face covers topics from boundaries to worry and provide Biblical truths and practical applications to help you walk in victory.
By: Whispers & Fringes
The Battles Women Face: Boundaries
A year ago, I learned something shocking about myself:
I was a boundaryless person.
And I found myself focused so much on being loving and unselfish, that I forget my own limits and limitations.
So, I was exhausted from never saying NO out of fear.
I felt I did not have the freedom to express my own thoughts and opinions.
And I was unable to manage my own feelings and detach from the manipulative emotions of others.
Sadly, I had not taken ownership of my life.
Thankfully, God’s Word showed me it was time to use biblical boundaries appropriately to achieve the relationships and purposes that God intends for me as His child.
I wanted to live a life of love, freedom, responsibility, and service.
The ability to set clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle.
In relationships, boundaries define who we are and who we are not, which impacts every part of our lives.
Fences are physical boundaries with the message: this is where my property begins.
Boundaries define what is me and what is not me. They show me where I end and someone else begins.
This leads to a sense of ownership, which gives us freedom.
Boundaries indicate what we are responsible for and what we are not responsible for.
Boundaries help us:
- Distinguish our property so that we can take care of it;
- To “guard our heart with all diligence”;
- Keep the good in (what will nurture us) and the bad out (what will harm us);
- Guard our treasures.
Whether it is a dysfunctional family, the world, your own religious self-righteousness, or the brokenness of being lost,
God can help you go from being an unhealthy person without boundaries to a healthy person with boundaries.
Remember David’s prayer. God’s desire is for you to know where your weaknesses are.
Ask Him to shed light on the significant relationships and forces that have contributed to your own boundary struggles.
Seek God’s help to protect your heart and to guide you with wisdom.
Find that you too can have the Ability to Say No when it is beyond your limit.
Proverbs 4:23 KJV
[23] Keep thy heart with all diligence; For out of it are the issues of life.
The Battles Women Face: Forgiveness
The battle to forgive comes in all shapes and sizes…
…. the childhood or innocence that you lost, the promotion that you felt was rightfully yours, or the happily ever after ending you wished you had.
Forgiveness simply means to release someone from a debt.
Usually, it’s a debt that the offender, even if they wanted to, could not repay.
However, God in his infinite wisdom commands me to forgive.
Why would God want me to let the person that hurt me “get away” with what they did to me?
Because He knows that unforgiveness holds me as prisoner.
Unforgiveness and bitterness harm me, not my offender.
The scripture says that bitterness defiles us and makes us captive to sin.
But we are not only affected spiritually, but physically as well.
Research shows harboring unforgiveness, anger, and hatred leaves our bodies in a state of chronic anxiety and stress,
high blood pressure, a weakened immune system, and an increased likelihood for depression.
Paul exhorts the believers in Ephesus not to give the devil a foothold.
The devil in this scripture is translated as “slanderer”.
Andy Stanley says that when we hold unforgiveness, we are giving the offender a staging ground into our life.
The person we hold unforgiveness towards might have moved on, but we continue carrying that person into our future.
He asks the question, “How long do you want to let your offender influence your future?”
Forgiveness is not earned because of what the offender does.
It is freely given, just as Christ freely forgave us.
And It is unconditional and one-sided.
It is required whether or not reconciliation ever occurs.
So how do I forgive?
- Make a decision to forgive.
- Be specific. Make a list of everything you feel you lost as a result of the offender.
- Pray for God’s help.
- Decide that the offender does not owe you anymore.
- Choose to walk in forgiveness on a daily basis.
“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you” – Lewis B Smedes
2 Corinthians 2:10-11 KJV
[10] To whom ye forgive any thing, I forgive also: for if I forgave any thing, to whom I forgave it, for your sakes forgave I it in the person of Christ;
[11] lest Satan should get an advantage of us: for we are not ignorant of his devices.
The Battles Women Face: Identity
An elderly lady walked up to the pharmacy counter and spoke softly to our clerk,
“Could YOU help me? … I’d rather HER not…HER kind of people are dirty.”
I was the ‘HER’ she was referring to, standing at a distance behind the counter.
Aside from some name-calling by a middle school bully, this was my first real experience with racism.
It’s been over a decade since the incident occurred, but I still remember how it made me feel.
My heart raced. My voice quivered. Her words stung.
But I knew who I was. And I was not dirty. No part of me believed or received those lies.
And I knew who I was (and still am) in Christ.
I am treasured. Also, I am sacred. And I am His.
It grieves me when I think that so many precious people do not understand their value.
They have believed the lies of the enemy spoken through the lips of a parent, spouse, coworker, acquaintance, or stranger.
John chapter 4 tells the story of a woman who knew the sting of racism and social prejudice.
She was a Samaritan woman and a five-time divorcee.
In those days, both titles screamed insignificance.
But I love how Jesus works and who He targets.
It was to this insignificant, and ostracized woman, Jesus chose to instill hope and reveal Himself.
“If you only knew the gift God has for you…. I am the Messiah.”
One encounter with Christ and this woman’s insignificance was buried and a new identity was birthed.
Maybe you have believed the lies of the enemy.
A parent who should have affirmed you, didn’t.
And A husband who promised to honor you, lied.
Whatever your situation, do not allow the voice of the enemy to penetrate into your Spirit and tear you down.
Rather, let the words of our Messiah infiltrate your soul and give you hope, “For if you only knew the gift God (still) has for you.”
Most importantly, I pray the words of our Messiah will remind you of your true identity.
You are treasured. And You are sacred. You are His.
The Battles Women Face: Purpose
I’m a sports fan, specifically a football fan.
When my team was in a win-or-go home game, I was…let’s just call it…highly enthusiastic.
As we watched the game with some friends, I would stand up and yell basically when anything happened.
Apparently, it got to be a bit much for the person behind me because he kindly asked if I could stay seated so he could see the TV.
My response to him was an emphatic, “I can’t help it!”
I think our purpose is a lot like that.
In the Bible, we encounter Moses.
He had the unique experience of hearing God say, “…You must lead my people Israel out of Egypt”.
Interestingly though, even before that happened, we were already seeing glimpses of how God intended to use him.
When Moses was back in Egypt and saw one of his fellow Israelites being beaten by an Egyptian, what does he do?
He steps in to defend him.
The next day, he sees two Israelites having a feud and again, he tries to help them resolve their dispute.
Later on, he comes to the aid of some women who were being harassed in the wilderness.
So, before there was the calling of deliverer, Moses had been living out that role.
We often think our purpose is a big mystery to be discovered but could it be it’s actually been a part of us all along?
What situations have you been in where you just couldn’t help but do something about it?
It may not have felt like anything big but it could be an indicator of something big that God wants to do in you and through you.
Also remember this, just because it is your purpose doesn’t mean it will be easy.
Moses had to deal with Pharaoh and a bunch of complaining Israelites along with the challenges of the Red Sea and living in the wilderness.
But every time, God was faithful to take care of him.
You are fearfully and wonderfully made with a unique set of skills, talents, and strengths.
God has equipped you to live your life on purpose for Him.
Before you know it, maybe you’ll be saying, “I just can’t help it!” as you begin to fulfill that calling.
The Battles Women Face: Rejection
Have you had a door closed in your life recently, or maybe even slam shut?
And now here you are left feeling rejected?
Don’t take it personally.
On second thought…if You are a believer, asking God for His will to be done, maybe you should take it personally.
In 1 Samuel 29, David is on the run from King Saul.
He is tired and worn out and finds a safe haven in an unlikely place, amidst the ungodly Philistines.
David became so chummy with these newfound friends, that he even offered to join their army.
King Achish was ready and willing to take David up on his offer but the other Philistine rulers resisted.
They knew of his great reputation as a leader in the Israelite army.
“Isn’t this the same David about whom the women of Israel sing in their dances…. He can’t go to battle with us.
What if he turns against us in battle and becomes our adversary.”
David might have forgotten his calling, but God didn’t.
A couple of chapters later, Saul dies, and David is appointed king.
Imagine if God hadn’t closed that door?
What would have become of David?
Would we still have our Psalms?
The great King of Israel might have become the not-so-great king of the Philistines.
Isn’t God good?
We all have a story like David.
I know I have tried to open doors.
Doors which would have led me down some pretty crazy paths… but thankfully, God in His mercy, took the time to close those doors.
What seemed like rejection proved to be God’s hand of intervention and grace.
And I know He has kindly closed doors for you too.
So, take heart and don’t be discouraged when you feel the sting of rejection as more doors seem to be closing for you rather than opening.
Give it time. I believe you will look back one day and see God’s hand in your situation as well.
The same God who cared enough about the destiny of David, cares about your destiny too. God has the final word.
The Battles Women Face: Words
Have you ever felt a pit in your stomach after you’ve shared something you shouldn’t have… or said something too quickly?
Gossip often feels good because it can be pleasant to hear or share.
Often, we even feel a sense of momentary satisfaction when speaking maliciously, talking sarcastically or giving a rude comment.
In the Christian community, it is easy to gossip under the umbrella of sharing to pray. It doesn’t take much to spread hurtful words.
However, if our conscience pricks us in our spirit, we feel regret and shame.
The Bible reminds us that our words actually expose our heart. Where is your heart?
It is difficult to undo the damage of gossip or a hurtful word,
but there are ways we can prevent making this mistake and ways to fix the damage if it’s already been done.
Here are some practical ways to watch our words:
- Slow Down: Think before you speak. The Bible has much to say about guarding our lips and speaking rashly.
- Talk Less: The Bible advises us to avoid people who gossip and says that we are considered wise when we hold our tongue.
We can save ourselves a lot of embarrassment and regret when we know how to be quiet.
Sometimes listening is more valuable than talking.
- Damage Control: What do you do when your words have hurt someone? Humble yourself and ask for forgiveness. You release yourself from being imprisoned by your own words.
Don’t wait too long. The sooner you deal with the hurt caused by those words, the sooner you will free yourself.
- Hide God’s Word in your Heart: Having disciplined quiet time with God allows you to stay in tune with His Word.
God deposits his wisdom in you so that you can avoid gossip and be an encouragement through your words.
The next time you are tempted to share some juicy details with someone, ask yourself:
- Is it kind?
- (And) Is it helpful?
- (Also) Is it necessary?
If the answer is NO, then it is safer to stay silent regarding the matter.
Our words expose our heart.
May our lips speak truth and kindness to those around us so that others can see the Christ who rules our heart.
Matthew 12:34 KJV
[34] O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.
The Battles Women Face: Worry
Worry seems to be a natural part of the human condition.
We worry about everything from our kids’ future to what we’re going to cook for dinner that night.
Worry has the ability to consume us.
In spite of that, we serve a supernatural God who specifically instructed us not to worry.
In the scripture (Matthew), Jesus tells us that we can’t “serve two masters”.
Then the next verse says, “THAT is why I tell you not to worry…”.
Jesus knew that the key to battling worry is tied to our worship.
We see the same concept in Proverbs 12:25.
It makes the point that “Worry weighs a person down…”.
In the Hebrew, it infers that worry makes the heart of a man stoop or worship.
The question is – who or what are we choosing to worship?
When we worry, we have made a decision to submit to something other than the sovereignty of God.
In my heart and mind, I have taken God off the throne…and put myself there instead.
So, how can we fight the battle of worry?
- Perspective – Ryan Leak says this, “You will always find it difficult to rest in the midst of a storm when you feel it’s your responsibility to calm the storm.”
In John 16:33, Jesus tells us we will have trouble but provides the assurance that He has overcome anything this world has to offer.
You don’t have to worry – He knew you were going to go through hard times, and He’s got it covered.
- Put it on His tab – We often give in to worry because we have forgotten what God has done for us in the past.
Over and over again in scripture, we see God telling His people to remember.
Why? Because we tend to forget.
Recalling the faithfulness of God in the past helps remove the feeling of worry in the present.
- Pray – Jimmy Evans put it like this, “Turn your worry list into a prayer list.” Worry accomplishes nothing, prayer changes everything.
Instead of talking to ourselves, let’s talk to the One who can do something about it.
John 16:33 KJV
[33] These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.
https://bible.com/bible/1/jhn.16.33.KJV
Also Read: Testimony: How Do You See Yourself? – Diademng (thediademng.org)
The Battles Women Face
